My Journey as a Stay At Home Mum!

Hello , and welcome back to my Little World. As you have noticed, I was MIA for nearly a year – no sight & sound of me! Where have I been?? What have I been up to??

Nothing much actually!!

Due to domestic ‘nanny’ issues, and while waiting for a new nanny to come aboard and get comfortable with my daughter , I decided to do what many working mothers would have dreamt of doing for their child – QUIT THEIR JOB TO BE AT HOME!!

After one year of being a ‘stay at home mum’, there is only one thing I can say – I have the utmost respect for every stay at home mum out there!!

From being a full time working mum with a professional job, I became a “domestic psychotic women with absolutely no life” . I am not joking!

I obviously loved every bit of the day, getting to spend time with my daughter. It was a time i will always cherish and remember, and appreciate the opportunity I had. Something many working mothers could only dream of. I became a better mother and person, cause I got to build that communication and bond with my daughter, and watch her grow at that beautiful age. She grew so fast in that one year, I feel I haven’t seen enough.

When you’re a working mum, obviously your only wish is if you could spend more time at home with your children, especially when they grow so fast. But when you’re a stay at home mum, you only wish you had that “ME” time to get back your sanity!! And getting a job could give you that “ME” time to get back your sanity!! I’ve been on both sides, and I’m saying it from experience!!!

Being a stay at home mum takes a whole lot of patience, guts and determination to do !! Thats it!!!

I think it also comes down to the support from your partner, and the time you get to still ‘pay a little attention to yourself’ . I think in that one year, I totally neglected myself and my feelings, and what I wanted in myself – cause all that mattered was my daughter, and I was not gonna leave her with just any nanny or babysitter. I took everything in the household as MY responsibility , since I was the ‘unemployed’ and ‘not earning’ one. From mummy duties, cleaning, cooking,gardening, doing grocery, making sure my daughter was still jumping and yelling in the mids of all that housework, doing laundry, and the list goes on and on. And thats not it – you do it on Saturdays & Sundays too !!!!! That it eventually became out of the norm if I wanted to go out with my girlfriends, or do a little “pampering” time for myself.

Before you know it, it’s Monday again – and you’re like “What the hell did I do over the weekend??!!”.

You wake up the next morning, and its like “here we go again” !

I’m not trying to complain – but with that much responsibilities,and you don’t have time to take a deep breath and remember who you are – you CAN loose your sanity and become a different person. It eventually made me a very numb person, who thought i wasn’t worth going out for a little pampering, or a little dinner treat, or just a little shopping time.I would throw my shoe at the next person that called me “a HOUSEWIFE” !! I wasn’t earning anymore, which made me even more worthless to do anything. I lost control of my life. I lost my direction.

I have always been a very independent person, and I would rather take it all on myself, than to pass it on to someone else. But this time it was different. I suddenly felt I couldn’t do it anymore, cause it was changing me as a person,a woman and a Mother. And I would have appreciated help. A lot of help.

I was just NUMB. And the only joy I had and kept reminding myself was the happiness and love I got from my daughter because I was at home with her. That will always be irreplaceable to me.

Never ever underestimate a stay at home mum. She has more will and power than anyone out there, cause it isn’t as ‘easy and relaxing’ as you think !!

Today I’m back at work, as a better person and a more ‘controlled’ person. I see myself again. I see myself building my career again, to give my daughter a better life in the future. I have less time with my daughter today, but I keep going cause she’s MY DIRECTION today.

She’s MY REASON today.

Do you Forgive or Forget ?

Has anyone ever told you –  “Be the better person and forgive them for their deeds” ; and you go ‘seriously?’

Is it seriously that easy to forgive someone who has repeatedly mistreated,disrespected & hurt you? Lets not talk about the person who accidentally pushed you on the bus, or the lady you had to fight with in the grocery shop to get that last box of milk for your daughter. I’m talking about people who have affected you mentally & emotionally. People who have given you that ‘scar’ in life, and you know you’re gonna remember that till the end of  life , no matter how much you try to erase it from your mind.

My question is, how easy is it to ‘forgive and forget’ someone who has hurt you? Do you really forgive and forget? Or do you just forgive, but you can never forget? Can you actually forget without forgiving? Or is it easier to forgive than to forget?

Over the years, I personally have been disrespected and hurt by many people close to me. When you keep getting hurt by the same people, you initially get very disturbed and upset by it.There were days I use to sit in my room and cry, and wondered why was I treated like a ‘stupid’. Was I really that much a ‘stupid’? It disturbs you mentally and emotionally more than anything else. But eventually, when you keep getting hurt by the same people – you will finally sit and wonder, ‘Is it me or is it really them that’s the problem?’

And that’s when you realize you have become matured enough to draw the line and put a stop to it. But even at that point, I just sat and became numb to all the crap that was going on. I didn’t wanna go low to their standards, so I just dealt with it. They think it’s ‘fine’ cause I’ve been their punching bag all this time. Do you forgive people like this?? Do you forgive people like this, just so they can do the same to my daughter? Do you forgive and forget?

A few days ago I read an article about how a man should watch what he says to his woman, cause she will never forget how she is treated by him – good or bad. But doesn’t that go for everyone? Yes we woman are obviously more emotional and sentimental with words and actions. But are you saying if a man stood there and got trashed by his boss with ‘out of the vocabulary’ words – he wouldn’t remember that day in 5years time? Yes I admit we woman have a longer and bigger memory storage than man ; but aren’t we all affected by words and actions if someone were to hurt us?

So where do you draw the line? Do you forgive people who has hurt you multiple times, in hope that they will change. Or do you keep them away, and protect yourself and family? Yes they always say you should be the ‘better person’ and forgive them. But whats the point if you cant forget? Personally I don’t think I can forgive a person if I cant forget. Obviously if you have forgotten it, you definitely have forgiven the person.But if you forgive them, will you trust them again? If you forgive, will you forget the words that were said? Will things be the same again if you forgive and forget? Do you forgive them even if they are not sorry for it? A little confused now? Join the club.

When I think about all the crap & s*#@! I have dealt with over the years , I look at it in a good way and thank god for teaching me so much. I have learned who to trust and who are there to pull me down with them. I can’t forgive these people, but I should thank them for making me a stronger person and opening my eyes. Forgiving a person just because they say we HAVE to, doesn’t mean its what you want in your life. We are not god. That’s what I’ve learned the hard way. Follow your heart and do what is right. If you really care and love a person, than forgive them for thats what your heart wants to do. But if you know this person is gonna hurt you again, be the stronger person and protect yourself and your loved ones from being in that ‘dark hole’.

I can never forget how one has disrespected and hurt me ; and I look at it as an opportunity to be the bigger and better person. Why??

Cause it always reminds me to never become ‘that person’ ; and that makes me happy in life.

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My Gold Ladder

After 31 years of my life, I can pretty much say I’ve been through many ups & downs in my dramatic life – and I know there are many more surprises ahead. NO i wasn’t born with a golden spoon in my mouth – cause my parents thought me how to live a normal life. I did the housework, ironed the clothes, swept the house after coming back from school, mopped the house on my Saturday mornings & helped my Mum cook dinner every evening before starting on my school homework. Pretty normal life to me.

From a very young age, I always admired my mothers strength. She was a very strong and determined woman who never gave up. She had her own career,while taking care of her 3 daughters. Having a full-time career never made her any less of a mother. She thought me values of life, she sat with me while I studied for exams, she thought me how to cook, she’s heard me cry a million times, she takes me for lunch & shopping on her days off, and she’s made me the lady I am today. So if she can do all this, why cant I .

She’s the reason today I drive myself with determination and energy to concur my world!

College life was never easy for me, only cause I didn’t have the life I wanted. My dream job was to become a Lawyer, and maybe an Interior Designer as a side hobby 😉 But since I was only given 3 options,which were – 1.Doctor,  2.Doctor and 3.Doctor – obviously you kinda figured which I choose eventually! Yes I thought I had the ‘fighting’ skills to kick a*# as a lawyer – but I guess being a doctor got to ‘tame’ me down a little. After 6 and a half years of service as a doctor,I finally decided to kick some a*#  & do something I had a passion for.

So since I couldn’t be an Interior Designer – designing a face wasn’t to bad either 😉 #AestheticMedicine

Yes I can be very stubborn & demanding – but only because I’m determined to get what I want. If I have to fight and break a 100 walls to get to my ‘treasure box’ – I will do it!! No I don’t believe in giving up, and no I don’t believe in giving in either. I will take the risk of my own decisions – and that’s what I have learned the hard way.

That could get me into a lot of trouble – but what is life without taking the risk !!

***Now you know why I wanted to be a lawyer!

Over the past few years- I have been back-stabbed,cheated, disrespected and lost a whole lot in my life. And it’s the worst feeling, when the ones who did it were people close to me. I’ve made many decisions in life – that were pretty much not in favour by some. But i’ve finally chosen my right LADDER.

It was a tough journey and I had loads of energy drained out of me – but today I look at it as a lesson learned in life. A very expensive lesson of course.

I know there are many like me out there,especially mothers,who are still striving to achieve their dreams. Yes I am 31 years old – and I’m still not at the top of my ladder. I have wasted many years living another persons dream – and what did I get out of that??? Makes me wonder. But it also doesn’t mean I have to keep falling down my ladder. I picked myself up,put on my shoes & went right back up my ladder.

Each step up the ladder,I may have to take 5 steps behind first. And if that has to happen, than I’ll learn to appreciate my one step up the ladder a whole lot more.

Never depend on anyone, or blame anyone if you have fallen down your own ladder. It’s your ladder, and if you have fallen – there are only 4 reasons for it ;

1.  You weren’t careful enough while climbing.

2. Your shoes were to slippery.

3. You allowed someone to push you down.

OR

4. You just choose the wrong ladder,which was broken.

Either ways – It’s your fault.

So pick yourself up, put on your right shoes, choose the right ladder & kick those who try to pull you down !!

Get inspired today,and never give up on your #GoldLadder .

XoXoXo

Never Ditch that Bottle of Sunscreen

Ever since I started my Masters in Aesthetics,Anti-aging & Regenerative Medicine – I’ve obviously started paying more attention to my skin and the aging process. Honestly I was never a big fan of sunscreens – only used them if I was going to the beach or was gonna spend an entire day in the park. Didn’t really like the idea of going to work with an oily face,and sometimes having a ‘white face’ due to the sunscreen lotion. I would buy one bottle a year,and it would be hiding on my rack the entire year!

However,I ditched that habit – and today I never leave home without a layer of sunscreen (especially on my face) !

And i’ll tell you why.

Let me go back to basics,and refresh all our memories about Ultraviolet Radiation. There are 3 types of Ultraviolet Radiation from the sun;

UVA , UVB & UVC

UVC – is the shortest ultraviolet ray and doesn’t reach the earth,cause it’s screened from the earth by the Ozone layer. Though it doesn’t reach us,it’s the most carcinogenic ray, and becomes increasingly problematic for those living at high altitudes.

UVB – is an intermediate wavelength ray. UVB can be absorbed by the ozone layer and the air. Therefore this ray is only partially absorbed by the ozone layer,depending on the wavelength of the ray and thickness of the ozone layer. This ray is usually responsible for your sunburns,and erythematous skin after prolonged sun exposure. UVB usually damages your outermost layer of the skin – called your ‘epidermis’.

UVA – has the longest wavelength, and is not absorbed by the ozone layer. Due to it’s long wavelength,it penetrates mostly into our deeper layers of the skin – called ‘dermis’. With even a low dose of UVA,it can cause photo-damaged skin leading to wrinkles and sagging skin. The issue with UVA is – tissue damage by UVA is cumulative,and the effects will not appear until after years of exposure. So you might not notice any changes now,but in 10-20 years you might have a severely damaged skin. UVA is also linked to development of basal and squamous cell cancers,as well as pre-cancerous lesions. Those who favour tanning beds – they use UVA radiation too.

This is an image I found on Google that best describes these rays in a diagram.

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On exposure to our skin, a proportion of these rays are reflected and the remainder is transmitted to our epidermis & dermis. The epidermis absorbs about 90% of UVB and 50% of UVA, while the remainder is absorbed into the dermis.

Now with a little basics of our ultraviolet rays, you would think that all this only occurs during the day while our sun is shining at its peak – you got it wrong!!

Even on a cloudy day, up to 80% of the sun’s harmful UV rays can penetrate your skin. Snow, sand, and water increase the need for sunscreen because they reflect sun’s rays. Whatever is coating the surface of the Earth around you can reflect or scatter UV radiation. Snow reflects the most UV of up to 80% !! So never ditch that sunscreen even during winter !

So how much sunlight do we necessary need?

Insufficient UV exposure can lead to skeletal diseases & Vitamin D insufficiency.While overexposure of UV can lead to skin cancers and eye disease. How much vitamin D is produced from sunlight depends on the time of day, where you live and the color of your skin.You only need to expose your skin for around half the time it takes for your skin to turn pink and begin to burn to get efficient Vitamin D.But i highly recommend you get the vitamin D you need from foods and/or vitamin supplements. This gives you the vitamin D you need without increasing your risk for skin cancer, AND without having to pose under the sun while counting the minutes!

So here are a few tips on how to choose a good sunscreen,and ‘why & how’ to apply them to your daily routine :

  1. Always look for a sunscreen with ‘Broad-spectrum’ protection written on the tube – cause this protects you from UVA & UVB.
  2. If it doesn’t have broad-spectrum written on the tube , than make sure it’s stated to have protection against UVA & UVB .
  3. Choose a sunscreen with Sun Protection Factor (SPF) 30 or greater.
  4. Water Resistance
  5. Sunscreen should be generously applied on all sun exposed areas – and reapplied every 2 hours or as indicated by the label.
  6. “One ounce, enough to fill a shot glass” is the guidelines used to consider the amount of sunscreen required to cover the sun exposed areas of your body.
  7. Highest UV index is during 11am till 4pm. So make sure you are protected during these times when you’re out for lunch.
  8. Always apply your sunscreen 15-30minutes before you leave home.
  9. Cream based sunscreens are best for face and dry skin.
  10. A sunscreen of SPF 30 can block up to 97% of sun rays. There are no sunscreens that can block 100% of sun rays. So don’t get fooled.
  11. Yes there are even sunscreens for toddlers and infants from 6 months onwards.
  12. Wear protective clothing – long sleeve shirt, sunglasses & a hat 😉
  13. FINALLY – a good sunscreen protects you from aging and sagging skin!

Now, would you still ditch that Sunscreen after this? 😉

XoXo

Are you “fasting” to lose weight?

Is “fasting” the best way to lose weight, or how some call it ‘Detox’ their body??
Will fasting for a few days clean my system and make me healthier?

The truth: Probably Not.

Many people turn to weight loss/fasting programmes using laxative teas, shakes, water and even enemas.
The truth is – fasting can be harmful to your body. It can cause toxins released from your fat tissue,at the same time depriving your body of nutrients your immune system needs to destroy them.
Prolonged fast can lead to muscle loss,or kidney and liver damage.

Energy deprived due to fasting?? Did you skip your breakfast? Bad choice.
Studies have shown that you’ll  be more alert through out the day if you had your breakfast, and include some proteins like egg,peanut butter or yogurt cause they increase alertness. Stock up in your Vitamin B – cause they help convert food to energy. And never forget to hydrate yourself,and get that much needed sleep at night 😉

So enjoy a good healthy meal today,and get a boost of energy !!

Let’s Get Fit !

For 5 months I had the advantage of using a single excuse that most of us use post delivery-

“I just had a baby, I’ll loose my weight soon.”

Yes I knew I was overweight during that 5 months, and yes I was on a ‘diet’ – but obviously I got my diet steps wrong,cause i barely lost 2kgs.

At my 4 month of motherhood, I had no choice and had to return to work. Till then I was very comfortable sitting around home,and hiding from the external world – and all I had to wear was my shorts & my big-baggy t-shirts. So fitting into my pre-pregnancy clothes was still not an issue,cause I didn’t need it – YET!

A week before i started work,it was time to face reality. I realized i wasn’t able to fit into my old pants,and my shirts became 2 sizes smaller!! I knew this was coming.But not being able to even zip my pants – THAT WAS NOT ACCEPTABLE!

OK Malini – you need new pants! Cause in one week I’m obviously not gonna lose 10kgs! So I grabbed my jeans to head out to get new pants – and that was another SLAP on my face! I obviously couldn’t even fit into my jeans!!

So what option did I have now?? Yup – I put on my maternity drawstring pants shamelessly,and went out to get new clothes! But I knew I couldn’t get away that easily from my excessive weight!

So I got a little selfish – and allowed myself to buy only 1 pair of jeans and 2 pairs of pants for work!! That is all I deserve!

So the 2 options I had was – I either keep wearing my maternity tops/clothes with this one pair of jeans,OR you lose your weight to get back into your old clothes. It sounds a little nasty and mean – but that was my only option!

And that was how my journey to getting fit begin.

Many mothers out there are very comfortable with their post-pregnancy bodies – and I totally respect these ladies for embracing it in a good way. However, there are some of us who would feel a lot more comfortable and confident in our pre pregnancy weight. Always remember,nobody should push you to it – cause you should decide what makes you confident & happy. Not your husband,partner,parents,siblings or friends.

Getting fit and healthy should come from your own will – you either want it or not! Cause it all depends on your determination and the time you put in. Many mistaken getting ‘THIN’ is the same as getting ‘FIT’. No!

I didn’t choose to be THIN – cause I felt being FIT was a lot more sexier 😉

I’m not saying I got a good-looking set of abs – cause i still haven’t reached there yet! But I’m very sure I’m a lot more healthier and confident with my body. My aim was to lose weight the healthy way. Never ever assume that by starving yourself – you’re gonna lose that 5kgs !! No way !

My first move was – get my ass to the gym!!

I’m not a newbie to the gym, but I still knew I needed a little ‘push’. So I got myself a Personal Trainer(PT) to give me that push, and guide me on getting healthy. But you don’t necessary need a PT if you have someone to guide you and accompany you at the gym. You need to make the gym your favorite spot – so grab your hubby or a friend and get yourself to the gym. Anything that makes you get to the gym is good enough; but please do not get yourself to the gym and waste your time chatting away with your partner/friend. So make it a good 1 hour of work,and sweat it out!!

Have someone guide you on how to use the instruments,and what is best for you. Before i got a PT, I use to assume everything was good for me!! I didn’t know the mechanisms of the machines,and grabbed everything that I was familiar with. That was another problem – it’s always our instinct to do things we are familiar with. Is it doing good or bad?? No idea- as long as I’m familiar with it! But that’s the wrong and lazy way!! Always explore and get an idea of the equipments available – ask questions and learn from the gym trainers. I’m very sure they’re  not gonna charge you for asking how to use a particular equipment.

You have to like the idea of going to the gym, so it doesn’t stress you out that you’re forced to go there. My PT was amazing! He was willing to teach me and go step-by-step with me,and gave me that extra push every time I hit the gym! He motivated me,thought me a lot – and most importantly he didn’t torture me in a ‘bad’ way,while giving me realistic expectations. So i use to love my gym routines!

Next step – ALWAYS HAVE REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS.

Never expect to lose 10kgs in a week or two!

Do not expect to drop 2 sizes after just 1month. Be realistic!! Always lose weight the healthy way,and don’t assume if you starve yourself this next 3days – i might just lose that 5kgs!! Nothing was built over night – so be patient and keep motivated.

In the beginning stages,you might feel that there’s no changes in your body & you’re just wasting time. But hang in there! It took me months before i could fit back into those old jeans.

It wasn’t an easy journey for me either – cause obviously nothing comes easy right!

Two months after i started the gym,I started developing a left knee pain. I being a typical doctor – figured I was ‘OK’ , and the pain was probably just a effect from the treadmill. So I continued with my gym sessions,but did alarm my PT that I was having this pain. So we took it a little slow with the treadmill,and focused more on carrying weights and working the upper body. I was still determined to go all out in the gym – since I was a full time working mum,I only had the advantages of going 2-3 times a week to the gym,so i had to make it a good one hour every time i hit the gym. Obviously 2-3 times a week wasn’t good enough,but that was all the time i could afford. So a ‘knee pain’ wasn’t gonna slow me down.

I kept ignoring the pain,and kept saying i was ‘OK’ – just so my PT wouldn’t slow down on me. Eventually the pain got so severe,I couldn’t even stand-up from sitting on the floor while carrying my daughter. If i had to walk up one flight of stairs while carrying my daughter – I would have to sit for a couple of minutes when i reached the top,cause the pain was so dreadful!!

Eventually i gave in,and got myself an appointment with a Sports Orthopedic Surgeon. Since my Xray was normal , i was asked to do an MRI of my left knee. Finally after 2 weeks of waiting – i was told i had a ‘Ruptured Popliteal Cyst’ in my left knee, and was ordered to take 6 weeks of complete rest on my knee for it to heal and dry up. Since the cyst had already ruptured, and from the MRI scans it was seen leaking through my muscles – there was nothing more left to do,but just rest and let it heal. Telling me to take 6 weeks of rest was not the worst news – BUT telling me that this can be recurrent and i could get it again – THAT was difficult to accept!!

Why i got it? The physiology started during my pregnancy, due to overwhelming of hormone production – causing overproduction of my synovial fluid in my knee, which eventually became a cyst and ruptured when i was straining my knee at the gym.

For 2 weeks i avoided the gym to allow the pain to subside,and by the 3rd week i was back at the gym – but totally avoided exercises for my lower part of the body. Thank god for my PT who was the best teacher – got me to work just my upper body,and still gave me a good workout in that one hour.

No matter what happened – I still kept motivated and didn’t allow anything to crash me down. I could have given up and stopped the gym completely – but that wasn’t what i wanted,and i wasn’t gonna allow it bring me down on what i wanted to achieve. Obviously since i couldn’t do my lower body exercises and my cardio was totally cut down – it was a lot more difficult for me to reach my goals,and that meant it was gonna take a longer time. But still – NOTHING WAS GONNA SHUT ME DOWN!

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Exercising wasn’t’ the only step I took to get fit – it was also what i put in my mouth that made a huge difference! My PT didn’t only teach me how to workout right – but he also taught me how to eat right! Always remember ,to lose weight – its 30% of workouts + 70% of your diet that does the trick! No point if you’re gonna workout everyday in the gym, and still come home and indulge in that Mc’Donalds burger for dinner!!

I started of with a low-carb diet,with lots of protein since i was going to the gym. Low carb diets are the best to start of with,and make sure you’re able to control yourself. It was very difficult for me in the initial few days, since i was doing it alone cause hubby thought it tasted like ‘cow-food’ and gave up after 2 days ;0

I use to count every net grams of carbs i took in a day,just to keep count of what  ate. Eventually after a few days on Google, i had found loads of recipes that were low carb – and yet tasted so good! This made the journey a lot more interesting, cause i started to experiment a lot in the kitchen,and grocery shopping became a lot more fun!! You would be surprised to find the different ingredients you can try to make one healthy dish. This became fun and challenging , instead of looking at it as a chore to eat right!!

I discovered the miracles of an air-fryer, how to make a low carb pizza , how to indulge in sugar-free chocolate cookies and still feel good , the benefits of peanut butter and the guilt-free of eating almonds!!

We all have our favourite meals we can’t give up – so learn to improvise on it and make it a healthy dish! When you practice this, the journey becomes a lot more easier and fun. Eventually my hubby started eyeing my dishes,and demanded he had the same thing i was eating 🙂

So it’s all about eating right & making it to the gym. You dont have to starve yourself,or how some people assume if they ate just fruits for a week – I might just lose all that weight ! NO way! Not one day have i practiced starving myself,or trying out on those ‘weight loss tea’ miracles . Please do not waste your money on those teas/drinks you get from some pharmacy. I had so much fun in the gym and cooking healthy for my hubby and me – that’s all you need!

Get motivated,or get someone to join this journey with you – it becomes a lot more fun,so you’ll can try new recipes and hit the gym together. Obviously you’re allowed to have those ‘cheat’ days once in a while. I like to do my ‘cheat’ days during the weekends when I go out with my hubby and daughter. So make it fun for yourself!! It’s all about eating healthy,and not starving yourself – cause starving yourself is just gonna bring down your metabolism , and thats the last thing you need to lose weight.

I dont have a toned set of abs YET (though i wish i did), or sexy toned arms – but i know I’m a lot more healthier and fit today,and i had a whole lot of FUN doing it!!

XoXo

My Fight with Weight Gain

During my younger & more youthful days , i was always an active person and never weighed more than 47kgs! At 5.5′ and 47kgs – i was obviously proud and satisfied with how i looked. I had my sports activities in school , my routine aerobic exercises i did at home while nobody was around, and my weekend classical-dance classes (Bharatanatyam) which was my favorite!!

I had everything on-board and was in the right direction – but than came my ‘devastating’ years of Medical College life. The student life begin,and down went the ‘healthy & fit’ me! Everything stopped,and that alone made me put on some unwanted weight. I obviously had to top it of with lots of junk food,fast food & a whole lot of oily food (especially since i was studying in India – where oil & ghee has no limits in their delicious canteens). I didn’t have time to exercise or eat healthy – and the extra weight was obviously not my ‘issue’ when you’re a Medical student. And this went on for years, until i got married – and i finally weighed a horrifying 54kgs!! ( I have never told anyone my weight except my husband – so this is a huge step for me.But what the heck!)

But nobody told me this was only the ‘beginning’!

As i started to embrace the life of ‘newly weds’ and being a new wife – i picked up a contagious infection from my husband – the skill of ‘loving food’! We were on a spree of trying everything out, and I being a ‘typical’ wife wanted to make the best pasta for my hubby – so bring on the cheese and cream sauce baby!! There were no limits,cause i had to make it taste right! Fortunately,I thank god for that beautiful long pool in our condo, which saved me many kilos.But that was just a typical excuse! So by the time I realized I was taking this to a different level , I was already 57kgs and 2months pregnant!

Obviously being pregnant i had to embrace the wight gain,but chose to still remain healthy in the beginning with my alternate day swimming at the pool in my condo. However,that only lasted me 2weeks!

Two weeks was all i had to celebrate my pregnancy,before every single sight of food made me nauseous. I was sick of food,and even the smell of food in the kitchen made me nauseous. That was a huge disadvantage to my poor hubby – cause I refuse to even enter our kitchen to cook food for him,or follow him out to feast on some good food at our favorite restaurant.

By the 4th month of my pregnancy,I was down to 54kgs with all the vomiting and hate towards food. I was living on fruits and soya bean drinks – for breakfast,lunch,tea & dinner. That was all I had.Occasionally on weekends – 2 slice of bread would be a good feast.

By the time I reached my 5th month of pregnancy – I was not given a choice! The meat had to go in, even if it was gonna come out in 10 minutes. I fought with everyone to ‘let me eat what I want’ – but as I said, I was not given a choice. And this went on till my last day of pregnancy!

So how on earth did I put on 20KGs when I was pregnant??!!!

Good question.

During my medical college days(again it goes back to those horrifying days) – I had a series of Acute Gastritis, which eventually got me to have recurrent gastric ulcers with uncomfortable indigestion! This flared up during my pregnancy,and made it a whole lot more difficult for me. By the time I was in my 7th month of pregnancy,it was so severe – that I had to start medications and improve my eating habits. So I was advised to eat smaller and more frequent meals, and reduce my stress!

This is where and how I put on my 20KGs !! I had to eat small meals even in the middle of the night – since I was already awake after vomiting out my pre-bedtime meal!! And to reduce my stress level, I obviously opted for a more unhealthier choice of meal. Two slices of bread with chocolate Nutella spread was a good small-stress free meal for me.

This eventually got me to a SLAPPING 74kgs at the end of my pregnancy!!!! (#facepalm moment)

My Angel was a healthy baby girl weighing 3.75kg. YES 3.75kg !! I made her as healthy and round like her Mum.LOL.

Postpartum was emotionally,mentally and physically a big challenge for me. I’m sure it is to any mother out there.** I will soon share with you on another Post -‘My challenges during Postpartum’.

We Indians have a Confinement period of 1 month/30 days – in which we are suppose to eat only certain types of food and spices, with very minimal fluid intake.Medically, it’s just not right to drink minimal water while breastfeeding.But our ancestors demand we do it – so just listen!! We are only allowed to have minimal rice with certain vegetables,fish or chicken;and it all has to be mixed with ginger.And only minimal water,with no other type of fluid intake.Honestly, I’m not sure how true is all this myths about confinement food and minimal fluid intake.Does it work? It might work,or it’s all just a myth from our ancestors. But for me, the only reason i do it – if it makes the elderly people in your home happy, than there is no harm in just doing it for a month. Why fight against it, when it’s just 1 month.Different people have their own views about this,and we should just respect them if it comes from our eldest.

Now how do we do all this for 1 month,while being jailed at home; AND adjusting to the new life of Motherhood? Yes we were allowed to eat rice – but i had another problem. I HATE RICE. From a very young age,the one thing that drove my mum mad about me was the fact I refuse to eat my rice! She made me sit on the table for HOURS, until my plate was cleaned. And i would literally sit for hours refusing to eat it. But that’s another whole story,so I wont get there.

So the first 2 weeks of my confinement,i couldn’t escape the ‘rice’. So that alone made me opt for way less rice,and this obviously drove my ‘confinement lady’ mad. But eventually, I made it through the 1 month – AND made it alive!!

By the end of my 1 month,with all this ‘confinement’ rules & breastfeeding at the same time – i was down to 65kgs.

65kgs is no where close to my ideal weight.For 5months,I used the same excuse many mothers have used,just to make ourselves feel better.

But for how long was I allowed to use this standard excuse –

“I just had a baby , I’ll loose my weight soon.”

After 1 year of hard work and determination, my weighing scale finally shows me 52KGs!

Follow my next post , and I’ll share with you my journey on how I lost that weight.

XoXo

8
November 2013

7
October 2014